You Effing Stink!!!!
It’s really simple as far as I can tell. If you work out – use some God Damn deodorant! I don’t think it’s asking too much is it? All you have to do is not smell, I’m not asking you to preform life saving brain surgery! I’m asking you to roll on some anti-stink juice so I don’t have to adjust the way I breath when I’m working out next to you.
There is nothing worse than jumping on a piece of cardio equipment next to Sir Stinks Alot and trying to share that same air space! No matter how much I turn my head in the other direction the stink still finds my nostrils and usually it effects my workout. Because after all who wants to be breathing in someones freggin’ armpit cheese!
But it’s not your fault, you don’t know your offending anyone because after all you’ve got no idea you smell like a rotting carcass. You’ve probably been a rotting carcass for a long time and frankly, you’re used to your own pungentness. I’m guessing that when someone walks past you that’s actually showered in the last 48 hours it’s somewhat offensive to you – well too bad!
Have you ever worked out next to someone that smelled so bad that you’ve quit your workout? I have! I almost did the other day. I’m sorry, I’m not trying to be a prick but if you smell – put on some deodorant so the rest of us aren’t stuck inhaling your funk! I’m serious as a heart attack here!
Now I appreciate a good work out, and I understand that sometimes mid-workout your Axe Jungle Love scented invisible stick is going to quit on you – I get it. But when I’ve been established on the elliptical trainer for the better part of an hour and you jump on to do your 15 minutes of warm up, and, you already smell like someone shot you and left you in the trunk of a car on a hot August day! I’m sorry pal – you’re uninvited to the party.
And while we’re at it – let’s have a very brief discussion about gym flatulence. Again, if I’m gathering as much O2 as I can because I’ve chosen “The Hills” workout in the programed selections and you feel the need to drop some of your ass. Well you’ll excuse me for wanting to drop you and your smell into Iraq so we can end this war we’re in.
Let’s just call it what it is – manners. Manners sort dictate that we don’t offend one another. A frankly a stinky ass Emmer Effer is offensive (at least to me) – so use your all day strong deodorant, stuff a cork up your ass and please enjoy your workout! What the Hell is up with that?
