Being a Scout now means you can acheive the 7th level of Doom?
Ummm, I’m struggling a little here. Maybe you can help me out? When I was growing up I spent about 15 minutes in the Boy Scouts. I remember that it all used to be about fitness, readiness and preparation. The Oath – On my honor I will do my best to do my duty to God and my country, and to obey the Scout Law; To help other people at all times; To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight; (amended) and to recover my health by visiting prostitutes then recovering funds by beating them to death and taking their money, while playing Grand Theft Auto!?!
Yeah, somethings not right here when you can get a belt loop or merit badge for playing video games! But the Scouting talking heads say they’re are just moving with the times and it’s not realistic to not included this is a list of possible patches to have Mom stitch onto your uniform.
In order to acheive such an honor you must complete these three requirements:
- Explain why it is important to have a rating system for video games. Check your video games to be sure they are right for your age.
- With an adult, create a schedule for you to do things that includes your chores, homework, and video gaming. Do your best to follow this schedule.
- Learn to play a new video game that is approved by your parent, guardian, or teacher.
Well there you have it, it doesn’t seem so bad when you try and infuse some good wholesome family values into say a game like Resident Evil 4, where it’s all together possible to find the corpse of a woman pinned up on a wall–by a pitchfork through her face. Or after you’re done with your homework you can play God of War were the player becomes a ruthless warrior, seeking revenge against the gods who tricked him into murdering his own family. Prisoners are burned alive and player can use ‘finishing moves’ to kill opponents, like tearing a victim in half. I wonder if you can earn a patch for actually ripping a body in half?
I get that I’m getting old and I’ve probably reached that point in my life where my changing world stops changing and a I no longer want to participate in those changes. If they offered a merit badge for not wanting to change… I’d have that one. But for me, offering a merit badge, belt loop or pin for playing video games takes away from the homophobic organization that the scouts proclaim to be. In all seriousness (forgiving for the moment the Homophobia) the Scouts have been a long standing organization that built themselves on the pride on molding young boys int productive young men. An Eagle Scout to this day is still one of the highest achievements you can receive as a young man. After all the likes of James Lovell (Houston we’ve got a problem), Bill Bradley (Former Knick turned Senator), Gerald Ford (38th US President), Steven Spielberg 9Film Director/Producer) and Walter Cronkite (Journalist, T.V. commentator)were all Eagle Scouts. So not just any neo maxi zoom dweebie becomes an Eagle Scout.
But with that rich tradition lets enter into the fold the fold the Video Game badge so that we can begin to lower the standard of what being a scout is. Because after all a Scout is A Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, reverent and able to slice your foe with a chainsaw from the groin upward while playing Gears of War 2! What the Hell is Up with That?
